Pain And Suffering

What's more painful... diet and exercise or going through last summer's "fat" clothes I bought to wear after just having a baby (I'll be out of these by next summer for sure, I thought)... only to find that my fat clothes indeed, do not fit.

They're too small.

By quite a bit.

So I did a good old fashioned separation of the wheat from the chaff.  It sucked.  

I sorted into several categories:

1.  Fits and is relatively cute - Keep

2.  Relatively cute but 1 size too small - Store on top shelf

3.  Relatively cute (or not) but 2 sizes too small - Donate

4.  Ugly - fits or not - Donate

5.  Have had since high school (yes, HIGH SHOOL), and I'm pretty sure I'm delusional about it being in style due to it's extreme comfort - Donate (except for those few pieces hidden in my "comfy clothes" stash)

I have LOTS of clothes stored on the top shelf (jeans, skirts, capris, shorts).

I have a GIANT bag of clothes t donate (everything under the sun).

I have 2 pair of shorts, 2 pair of jeans, 1 skirt, 1 pair of capris (that I need to mend), and a handful of tops that fit (but are pretty ugly...gotta have something to wear).

I'm not sure if I want to cry and eat chocolate or jump for joy at not having to sort through too small "fat" clothes the next time I go to the closet.

What will it take for me to lose weight?  I really don't know.  I've been eating veggies like I'm some kind of rabbit lately.  I've been running.  I've been lifting weight.  Still - the scale shows me a number that has never appeared outside of pregnancy for me.  

I'm so frustrated.  And confused.  And pissed off.  And feeling ugly.

Had some blood work done recently as part of a physical.  I was so hoping that it would show some sort of thyroid imbalance.  Then, at least, I'd have a good explanation for why I can't seem to lose the weight.

Have I mentioned how pissed off I am?